29 replies to this topic

[Shadowhawke]

Wow. Been a ripper of a ride as always. I've only just caught up to the first four chapters, but already I'm really enjoying Shepard's perception, insight, and awesome talk. I'm also intrigued as to how you've done Miranda and Jacob. And it's great to see Tali again.

I'll be working hard to catch up. Thanks for sharing this with us once more.

[Bluenose]

It's strange. I read each page of text after I write it. I read the whole thing afterwards, and I still make spelling misteaks. Sometimes ones that aren't deliberate. Catching them days or weeks later makes me feel so stupid.

I'll admit Miranda is one of my favourite NPCs. Some of her bitchy comments are great. On the other hand, there's only room for one Queen Bitch in this party!

Jacob, well, every group of NPCs needs a Captain Normal, and in this game it's him. I hardly think about him much, and yet, he's got depths to him. He's also one of the female romance options, and every time a female Shepard walks up to him to talk it's all very suggestive. Which personally I find annoying if my Shepard isn't interested in that romance. Give us a business-like approach to use when it's obvious there's no nookie likely. Though he does have one awesome 'bro' moment with both male and female Shepard.

Tali, well I'd read the spoilers. I knew she was a party member of ME2. Then Chapter Five happened.

And now I'm curious. Did you buy Mass Effect 1 in the end?

[Shadowhawke]

*snickers*. Oh yes. Positive thinking. Love that line. And given you're writing so fast, it's perfectly understandable that there are a few mistakes here and there. They don't lessen the enjoyment of Shepherd's adventures though.

As for ME1, it's sitting on a busted computer right now, unfortunately. I'm not sure if it's the RAM or the Motherboard, but either way there will unfortunately be a lot of fixing before I can play ME.

[Bluenose]

*snickers*. Oh yes. Positive thinking. Love that line. And given you're writing so fast, it's perfectly understandable that there are a few mistakes here and there. They don't lessen the enjoyment of Shepherd's adventures though.

Poor Zoe. She's trying to be nice, honestly, but then a renegade interrupt comes up, my finger clicks the button, and someone ends up bleeding from the nose and calling her a bitch. It's very unfortunate.

Mind you, some of the paragon options in this game make me wince. There are a few I reckon which would have been renegade in Mass Effect 1.

As for ME1, it's sitting on a busted computer right now, unfortunately. I'm not sure if it's the RAM or the Motherboard, but either way there will unfortunately be a lot of fixing before I can play ME.

That's sad. I remembber how I was feeling when my video card went down for two weeks while I was in my playthrough of Dragon Age, so much sympathy is extended.

Edited by Bluenose, 10 August 2010 - 04:49 AM.
missed out a word

[Shadowhawke]

Thanks for the sympathy. Things are up and running again, but now I've misplaced ME. One day I will get things right.

Finally caught up to your most recent update. It's been very, very fun. You really do bring the characters to life in so many ways. The confrontation with Ashley and Anderson was sad, but awesome, and Zoe is as always amazing.

Looking forwards to more .

[Bluenose]

Thanks for the sympathy. Things are up and running again, but now I've misplaced ME. One day I will get things right.

Finally caught up to your most recent update. It's been very, very fun. You really do bring the characters to life in so many ways. The confrontation with Ashley and Anderson was sad, but awesome, and Zoe is as always amazing.

Looking forwards to more .

Then more there will be.

Something I've noticed in another playthrough; if you romanced Ashley in the first game, she's a little unpleasant to you when you meet her again on Horizon. Zoe got off lightly. Both Zoe and Ashley felt hurt and betrayed by the end of that conversation, and of course Zoe felt bad talking to Anderson after he'd shown that regardless of what he said he really didn't believe her. I did my best to get that to come across. If she'd been offered Spectre reinstatement after that, I suspect the 'stuff your offer' option wouldn't have required much thought.

It's strange. You meet Garrus, and you're happy but he's down after his squad got killed. You meet Ashley (or Kaiden) and you start off happy while they're angry. You meet Tali, and again Shepard might be happy but Tali has lost most of her people (all of them if you don't make Reegar stand down). The game manages some real emotional highs and lows. There's a number of incoming emails that relating to things you did in the first game that have effects in the second. And then there's Conrad Verner, and how he makes Zoe cry...

"Lies. I was not crying. I had something in my eye." [/angry Zoe]

[Shadowhawke]

You truly have a simple yet beautiful way of communicating the emotional moments in ME2. The scenes with Jacob's dad and T'soni absolutely floored me. Poor, amazing Zoe.

[Bluenose]

What's the sound of a heart breaking? Zoe Shepard loading up another grenade.

That meeting is one of the most shocking moments in the game, if you romanced Liara in the first. I can't decide if Bioware were brillliant or awful with it. I tried as hard as I could to get across how Zoe was feeling before and during her meeting with Liara. I'm not entirely happy with how it came out, but then I rarely am. I like to think her nervous excitement beforehand and shock afterwards came through. I feel better about the scene on Aeia with Jacob's father. That's a situation bad enough that one of my Paragon characters let the hunters through to him.


I wouldn't feel too sorry for Zoe, though. I'm taking seriously the concept of three stages of grief. At the moment she's still going through disbelief, which is why some of her behaviour may seem a little out of character. That won't last, she's seen enough strange things that disbelief is fleeting. When she has time to stop and think, she'll move on to stage two. And that's anger. Angry Zoe doesn't play nice with others.

[Shadowhawke]

Mmm... I must admit, I didn't think there were out of character moments because you explained Zoe's motivations pretty well. I do think the nervous anticipation and then horrible shock and hurt came across really well, although to me it felt more like shock than disbelief afterwards driving her, if that makes any sense.

Angry Zoe will be interesting. And sad too. I'm looking forwards to it.

[Bluenose]

Niftu Cal, the alternative ending.

Zoe smirks at the volus. "Charge."

He sets off down the passage, wobbling along and bouncing off the walls. As the door opens, he staggers through. "Wasea! Your doom has come. I will make your end swift." Summoning all he biotic might, he sends a wave of biotic energy towards the asari captain. It leaves a very faint mark on her forehead. As he wobbles in the doorway, exhausted, she summons her own biotics. Her throw smashes him back against the wall, smashing his suit open. She watches for a few seconds as he chokes to death on the poisonous oxygen, before looking back at her datapad.

"Everything's gone to hell since we smuggled that filthy creature off world."

There's some lovely lines in that scene from your companions. From Kasumi's, "Ahhh, can we keep him?" when he first turns up, through Thane's moment at the end where he's wandering off. "Enjoy your sleep. And may you dream of bulbous women."

On a more serious note, Tali doesn't seem like the sort of person who'd ignore it if Shepard was being unusually brutal. And I'm sure she both likes and respects Zoe, and isn't going to stand by. So maybe we see a slightly less angry Zoe than if some other characters came along.

[Shadowhawke]

Okay, angry Zoe and Samara and everything that's happened... all really interesting. Even the return of Conrad Verner was pretty hilarious. I love how you're including the little notes to Shepard in this too - they really round out the world and bring back some great memories. Not to mention, I'm really loving the focus on the characters here. And how Zoe calls the Reaper 'Harby'. Heh.

Looking forwards to more.

[Bluenose]

Nine pages in Word, that's more, yes?

Conrad Verner makes one more appearance in this story. Of course, he might be more prominent in Mass Effect 3. If Shepard dies in the suicide mission at the end, and it is possible, guess who takes over the role in the final part of the series? He has experience, after all.

I thought the messages, and some of the other little references to ME1, were a great part of Mass Effect 2. I like that the decisions taken then have consequences later, even if most of them are small. And I suspect ME3 will make some of them very significant.

I think by now, Zoe is pretty much sure that Harbinger is a Reaper ship. Harby rolls off her tongue better.

[Shadowhawke]

Hey Bluenose!

Aargh, sorry I haven't commented in a while. Been trying to catch up, amongst other, pesky real life things.

What can I say? Aside from the fact that since I've last commented, you've gone through some pretty amazing arcs. Yes, you still have a few spelling mistakes and grammar errors, and sometimes I'm not sure who the third person on your team is until a brief mention in battle, but damn if they don't really affect the way you manage to convey and transmute all those emotions from the game. Your portrayals of the characters really come across and the environment descriptions are great, with just the right hint of creepiness or otherwise.

Needless to say, I'm still avidly enjoying this.

[Bluenose]

I'm finding I can't keep up the pace I managed through August any more. Being back at work after the summer holidays means I've constantly got new students needing help, and less time to write or think about what I'm going to write. Chapters are getting shorter, and I'm still making more errors than I'd like. 'It's' as a possessive being my commonest. I like to think I'm getting a bit better than I used to be, since I can look at some of the older chapters and wince.

As for the third person on the teams, what I've mostly been on lately is personal loyalty missions, and the third character often has little to say. I try to mention their presence, but when they don't do anything it can be hard coming up with interjections for them. Zaeed is perhaps the character with most comments during missions. The trouble with using him is he's a tough, well-armoured, good-with-guns, soldier (with a streak of nasty in him). So is Zoe. Party balance is more abstract than in ME1, but I still like to try for it. And no matter how much fun he is, Zoe doesn't need someone getting in her way while she does her job of being punching bag for enemy mooks.

[Shadowhawke]

Ah, that explains some things. Fair enough.

I'm enjoying Legion! That action sequence was done very nicely. I'm curious to see more of Tali's reactions as well, seeing as she's sworn to keep an eye on it.

Heh, sorry for the short post, I gotta go... just dropping in to say I'm certainly still enjoying this.

[Shadowhawke]

If this Spectre business doesn't work out, I think I'll start selling ethics to batarians.

Pure brilliance. . I like how you covered Zoe's pride for the crewmembers as well... the little additions you made with what the individual members did to fight the Collectors was really heartening. It added even more emotion to an already shocking scene.

Not to mention that part at the end. I love how you've so realistically made Zoe's character so she can do stuff like that and also set over-talkative Krogans on fire.

[Bluenose]

Warning: chapter 59 may require use of a sick-bag. Maudlin Zoe may lead to extensive laughter. The management accepts no responsibility for people who laugh themselves silly. Renegade interrupt (clip round back of Zoe's head and advice to pull yourself together) used at owner's own risk.

[Shadowhawke]

Oh wow! Into the finale with such zest... even though I've seen how it ends, you really had me hanging on all the choices you made individually. And damn if I didn't enjoy seeing Harbinger's bodies keep dying .

That ending was evil though. Very, very evil. Can't wait to see what happens there.

[Bluenose]

Garrus is tough. At least in cutscenes. He was shot in the head with a rocket in one, and survived.

Though for some reason, now I'm replaying Mass Effect 1, in that he doesn't seem to survive quite as well. I've use 'Spectre Resurrection' on him a lot. Presumably he levelled up a few times on Omega between games.

[Shadowhawke]

Presumably. And damn, you got my heart beating pretty quick with Tali as well.

The last scene with the Illusive Man was really awesome as well. Aargh, what can I say? You've gotten me pretty speechless - I loved the way that you did the finale, and I'm looking forwards to whatever else you've got up your sleeve.