Comments on "A Winter's Tale"
#21
Posted 23 November 2008 - 02:49 PM
And as always, Rizdaer and Anariel's parts were fantastic It will be interesting seeing their lessons, I think! I also loved the way Anariel delivered her ultimatum - very strong. Overall, the chapter was again an awesome read, so thanks! And once again, I really can't wait to read more.
Through lightning, travel shadow,
Through hell and all above,
Surviving sword and arrow,
Bound stronger by the love
***
And in the end a witness,
To where the death has lain,
Silent through the sorrow,
Where innocents lie slain
#22
Posted 23 November 2008 - 04:15 PM
It is a pleasure to write for such an appreciative reader.
I have been trying to bring out the other characters in the
company as requested, Diriel just happened to be in a bad mood.
I love writing for Peony, and Jaemal is just a sweetheart. I think though,
that the others will come to find him to be made of sterner stuff than they
realize at this point. But it is easy to see Peony and Jaemal's
relationship evolving into a close friendship.
As for Anar and Riz, well, they almost write themselves
I am hoping that I have been giving the elven maid enough faults to keep her from becoming Mary Sue-ish.
In the next chapter, something or someone may visit from her past, giving a glimpse of
what she is trying to escape. If I am right, a crack may appear in her carefully built armour.
I shall also continue to work on bringing the others out of their shells as the story
allows. Some will fit better in some places than in others, as we will see.
I think as our intrepid company moves away from the boundaries of Targos,
we will see more of the personalties shine.
Again, thank for reading along, and for looking forward to the next chapter (does happy dance . . . !!!).
Also may I thank-you for taking the time to review, it helps more than you know.
Til we meet again,
CelticRose
#23
Posted 23 November 2008 - 07:12 PM
Again, thank you for writing this. I really am enjoying it.
Through lightning, travel shadow,
Through hell and all above,
Surviving sword and arrow,
Bound stronger by the love
***
And in the end a witness,
To where the death has lain,
Silent through the sorrow,
Where innocents lie slain
#24
Posted 16 February 2009 - 03:57 AM
Bit of catching up here, a rather impressive amount of detail in all the scenes from my tell, a particular jewel stands out with the dinner conversation in the most recent chapter you've blessed us with.
To be honest I was a little surprised by Ulbrec's character, seemed a bit different to his usual half-grumpy drill instructor self.
But either rate, really enjoyable reading material going on there, and I look foward to the next chapter, as always.
Classic Adventures - a Total Conversion compilation dedicated to bringing many of the old and new PnP modules into the wonderfully dangerous world that is Baldur's Gate II. Fancy link button to Downloads page.
CA Forum. Bugs to be squashed, feedback to be welcomed!
Website at: http://classicadventuresmod.com/
~***~***~***~
When in doubt, lockpick a mudcrab!
Beware the nug conspiracy!
#25
Posted 16 February 2009 - 09:18 AM
Heya Celticrose!
Bit of catching up here, a rather impressive amount of detail in all the scenes from my tell, a particular jewel stands out with the dinner conversation in the most recent chapter you've blessed us with.
What jewel? Oh please don't make me guess! lol I had a rough time with the dinner conversation, rewrote it several times . . . so please, put me out of my misery and tell me what you felt stood out, in a good way? a bad way?
To be honest I was a little surprised by Ulbrec's character, seemed a bit different to his usual half-grumpy drill instructor self.
Yes, well, the commander had his "town officiate' hat on that particular afternoon. He was also feeling in debt
to Anariel, she did after all, agree to ferret out the goblins and look for what's behind the curtain. With her acceptance of the task, he could keep his soldiers close to home, so it wouldn't do to alienate her now.
Glad that you are enjoying the read,
Till later,
CelticRose
#26
Posted 16 February 2009 - 03:41 PM
Just one little note, though. I noticed that you sometimes put commas where you don't need to. For example, in this segment:
A well laid fire within the hearth, chased away the chill of the evening. Its heat beckoned, as did the goblets of wine, hard ciders, and tankards of golden ale, that had been set up on the side board.
In both sentences, the last comma isn't really needed and breaks up the flow of your beautiful writing.
Nitpicking aside, though, I'm on tenterhooks to reed more . The way you left it with Ruath, Anariel and Rizdaer was fantastic. I can't wait to see what happens next.
Through lightning, travel shadow,
Through hell and all above,
Surviving sword and arrow,
Bound stronger by the love
***
And in the end a witness,
To where the death has lain,
Silent through the sorrow,
Where innocents lie slain
#27
Posted 16 February 2009 - 04:53 PM
Thank so much for your review. I admit . . . the dinner conversation gave me a run for my money.
I had to rewrite it several times before it felt right. And Ruach threatened to take over the whole piece.
Not uncommon for his type of character .
He will be in the next chapter, not sure about a third, since he thinks he going to be able to abscond with
Anariel and take out Rizdaer, (he-he-he). Old Mr. Golden Elf must really have led a sheltered life never
to have never dealt with a drow
The backstory I am revealing here and in the next chapter is to set the story up for the distant future.
It will come back into play when the adventure in the ten towns is done and I take the story back to
Anariel's starting point. I am looking forward to seeing how much the company has grown by then
Since I am but "their" humble scribe, it will be a bit of a surprise to me also
My thanks for your faithful following,
CelticRose
#28
Posted 16 February 2009 - 06:38 PM
Jewel being the metaphor for the scene.What jewel? Oh please don't make me guess! lol I had a rough time with the dinner conversation, rewrote it several times . . . so please, put me out of my misery and tell me what you felt stood out, in a good way? a bad way?
The subtle workings are the bits that particularly let it shine, well worth the effort you've put into it methinks.
Classic Adventures - a Total Conversion compilation dedicated to bringing many of the old and new PnP modules into the wonderfully dangerous world that is Baldur's Gate II. Fancy link button to Downloads page.
CA Forum. Bugs to be squashed, feedback to be welcomed!
Website at: http://classicadventuresmod.com/
~***~***~***~
When in doubt, lockpick a mudcrab!
Beware the nug conspiracy!
#29
Posted 16 February 2009 - 09:11 PM
Jewel being the metaphor for the scene.What jewel? Oh please don't make me guess! lol I had a rough time with the dinner conversation, rewrote it several times . . . so please, put me out of my misery and tell me what you felt stood out, in a good way? a bad way?
The subtle workings are the bits that particularly let it shine, well worth the effort you've put into it methinks.
I guess not 'getting' your subtlety, does not say much for me lol
Thank-you Solar Harper for your notice of my hard work, (you're right, and having it noticed and appreciated does make it all worth it).
Thanks for following the tale,
C.R.
#30
Posted 23 February 2009 - 10:56 AM
Hope to see another chapter soon but be sure to take your time and enjoy the writing
#31
Posted 23 February 2009 - 10:34 PM
I have to say I've greatly enjoyed the latest chapter. The dinner scene was wonderfully done and with such a variety of characters and temperaments. I'm almost tempted to ask you for your secret, how do you write banters? I actually love the slow buildup of the story since I hope it'll be very long so I can enjoy it all the more.
Hope to see another chapter soon but be sure to take your time and enjoy the writing
Thank-you so very much for your review,
I truly love getting feed-back, it help tremendously to guide me.
As to my secret to banters, well, I can't take credit for all of it. I must say that the characters and the situation provide much of the input. Some characters are easier than others . . . like Diriel, he is more difficult for me. Anariel's character is my own creation, so she is easy for me. And I must say, Rizdaer is quite easy too, especially where Anariel is concerned. Jaemal is such a sweetie and such a gentleman, he is easy to predict. Likewise Peony and the others.
If I truly had a secret to banters, I would share it, I just "hear" them conversing. Sometimes it is a challenge to write for so many voices . . . but there are times when it just "works."
And no fear, I always enjoy writing, if it feels too much like work, it is time for a break! lol
Again, I thank you for reading along,
CelticRose
#32
Posted 25 February 2009 - 12:26 AM
Nevertheless, I'm eagerly expecting the next chapter to see if Riz will really need those weapons the very same night.
#33
Posted 26 June 2012 - 01:00 AM
I liked your little snapshot promising what's to come, you had me quivering in annoyance by the end. I'm sure Anariel and the others can deal with him, but I still can't wait to see how.
So yes, a big welcome back, and thanks for continuing with this one. I've always enjoyed it.
Through lightning, travel shadow,
Through hell and all above,
Surviving sword and arrow,
Bound stronger by the love
***
And in the end a witness,
To where the death has lain,
Silent through the sorrow,
Where innocents lie slain
#34
Posted 01 July 2012 - 01:25 PM
Anyhow, I hope to tie up a few loose ends with Ruach, (Of course that could be interesting if I give Rizdaer his way in this .
then our merry (?!?) little group can move on to an enemy that looks the part, lol.
Thank-you again,
CelticRose
#35
Posted 22 January 2013 - 04:31 AM
Hi CelticRose. Great to see another chapter up, sorry it took me so long to comment!
What can I say? It was amazing to see Ruach get his comeuppance from everyone. Really enjoyed that part. Not to mention, the fate you consigned him to, as well as the final image you left us with was exquisite.
Regarding your author's notes, it sounds like you've had an amazingly busy time recently and I think everyone understands that real life comes first. I, for one, am just really glad this story is still alive. Thanks, best of luck with real life, and I look forward to the next chapter, whenever it may be.
Through lightning, travel shadow,
Through hell and all above,
Surviving sword and arrow,
Bound stronger by the love
***
And in the end a witness,
To where the death has lain,
Silent through the sorrow,
Where innocents lie slain
#36
Posted 26 January 2013 - 03:31 PM
Thank-you Shadowhawke, I appreciate your review and am glad that I did not disappoint.
The spiders were all Rizdaer's idea and I had to give in to him since I wouldn't let him out and out
kill Ruach, who I might add shall remain a threat much later in the future . . .
For now I think the little group must endeavor to move on.
Again, thank-you for your comments . . .
Til the next chapter,
CelticRose