Comments on the Irony of Fate
#21
Posted 03 February 2008 - 10:52 AM
I don't mind my story being forgotten, I'm just glad you found it again. However, I feel some amount of blame in your comment regarding "unpredictable intervals". I plead guilty, but I promise it shouldn't happen again. From now on Irony of Fate should be updated every two weeks.
And thanks for the nice review
#22
Posted 26 February 2008 - 02:05 PM
You are a very good writer. There was a minor instance of using the word "praying(communing with deity)" when it should have been "preying(taking advantage of/hunting/whatnot)", but that's...nothing to do with the overall quality of your writing.
Life's not fair, is it? I think I said the same thing as BloodHeron on fanfic.net, but if I thought you'd captured the spirit of that before...the whole idea has grown more solid now, I think. I always wondered how the world was going on between <Bhaalspawn captured> and <Bhaalspawn escaped>. It's nice that you didn't go straight to that accursed dungeon. The story would have been far less interesting if you had. All the characters also have a very good texture to them, if that makes any sense. They're chipped and frazzled and lumpy in all the right places, not flawless or, worse yet, *too* flawed. Thank you also for making Anomen a palatable character, when Bioware FAILED. You're showing the sides of him that aren't labeled "pompous windbag" and I think we can all appreciate that.
And your Bhaalspawn is very well done, very real, one of the few that actually feels real. Though I feel like an idiot for being unable to figure out her race. It'll probably become apparent to me right after I post this, though.
All in all, great work of art here. I hope your muse continues to dump inspiration on your head!
#23
Posted 28 February 2008 - 11:27 AM
And I'm glad you did! It's always nice to know that somebody actually read this stuff...So I'm finally getting off my lazy arse and reviewing.
I'll do a text search for that... hate to leave those stupid typos around...You are a very good writer. There was a minor instance of using the word "praying(communing with deity)" when it should have been "preying(taking advantage of/hunting/whatnot)", but that's...nothing to do with the overall quality of your writing.
Ah, so you've been lurking around on ff.net too True, life's not fair. And sometimes, we even play along and make it even less fair for ourselves. That's the irony of fate as I see it. Thank you so much for commenting on my characterizations... those are real people I'm writing about. (Well, they're real in our imaginations at least...)Life's not fair, is it? I think I said the same thing as BloodHeron on fanfic.net, but if I thought you'd captured the spirit of that before...the whole idea has grown more solid now, I think. I always wondered how the world was going on between <Bhaalspawn captured> and <Bhaalspawn escaped>. It's nice that you didn't go straight to that accursed dungeon. The story would have been far less interesting if you had. All the characters also have a very good texture to them, if that makes any sense. They're chipped and frazzled and lumpy in all the right places, not flawless or, worse yet, *too* flawed. Thank you also for making Anomen a palatable character, when Bioware FAILED. You're showing the sides of him that aren't labeled "pompous windbag" and I think we can all appreciate that.
You're not the first one who seems... surprised? that Anomen can be nice. Even as Bioware wrote him, I always figured his arrogance was only a defence mechanism, because after a dozen or so talks he becomes quite vulnerable. And he's a healer, too, and a damn good one... there had to be caring hidden deep under all that harsh pretention.
You know, you're right, I never really wrote it clearly, but she's human. Maybe I didn't feel like mentionning it because it felt like "default identity", lol.And your Bhaalspawn is very well done, very real, one of the few that actually feels real. Though I feel like an idiot for being unable to figure out her race. It'll probably become apparent to me right after I post this, though.
Thanks! I'm blushing to my screen in pleased embarrassment right now because of all the nice things you've said to me!All in all, great work of art here. I hope your muse continues to dump inspiration on your head!
#24
Posted 07 March 2008 - 12:27 PM
#25
Posted 09 March 2008 - 01:12 AM
Through lightning, travel shadow,
Through hell and all above,
Surviving sword and arrow,
Bound stronger by the love
***
And in the end a witness,
To where the death has lain,
Silent through the sorrow,
Where innocents lie slain
#26
Posted 11 March 2008 - 12:20 PM
Weeeeell... Thank you for your review.Well well...just read it, and i liked it, even though it's really fast paced. I am kinda sad about minsc not being much in the group, and about the anomen romance :/ I would have loved illre being a tad more loyal, but, well, she is young :/
Hi ShadowhawkeWow DalreiDal... great new chapter, with some interesting twists. I can't wait to see what will happen with Ilire, Anomen, and Ajantis when they get to Windspear. And please rest assured, my friend, that there are many of us still reading this excellent fic.
Windspear just a chapter away... You should have all your mysteries clarified by next week
Thanks a lot for the continued reviews!
#27
Posted 22 March 2008 - 03:44 AM
Through lightning, travel shadow,
Through hell and all above,
Surviving sword and arrow,
Bound stronger by the love
***
And in the end a witness,
To where the death has lain,
Silent through the sorrow,
Where innocents lie slain
#28
Posted 22 March 2008 - 08:08 AM
So Anomen wasn't too out of character even though he didn't completely fly off the handle in insecurity and fear to lose Ilire now that Ajantis was back in the picture? Phew! lol
But anyway, thanks for your review! I am reassured that characters interaction were still believable even though I've stretched "cannon Anomen" a little. So, thanks!
#29
Posted 05 April 2008 - 01:12 AM
But now, on to the chapter you wrote! Absolutely stunning stuff, my own gut seemed to be shrinking when I was reading the latter half of the chapter... I know it's a cliche that I keep repeating to say that I can't wait until the next chapter, but I really can't. The tension between all of the characters is quite gripping.
Just one comment I have to say, though; I was surprised at how little Jaheira said during the confrontation. Then again, I can see her being silent when she thought it was needed and speaking her mind later. What do you think?
Through lightning, travel shadow,
Through hell and all above,
Surviving sword and arrow,
Bound stronger by the love
***
And in the end a witness,
To where the death has lain,
Silent through the sorrow,
Where innocents lie slain
#30
Posted 06 April 2008 - 11:03 AM
I always thought Anomen was better than most players gave him credit for. If you can survive through his first lovetalks, he actually becomes rather sweet, and there's a mix of surface artificial gallantry (i.e. first lovetalk of ToB) and deep down vulnerability (i.e. when calling his father a drunken bastard, when worrying for his sister, when reflecting upon the ascension possibility at the end of ToB) in his later dialogs that I like very much. I think the basis is there for a coherent character with more tolerance than he shows in game.Heh, you're right... canon Anomen has been overstretched a little, but your Anomen is true enough in some ways to reality that it is believable. You're showing his better half, which is what he has always and does possess, we just don't see it as much in-game.
Thanks! More tension coming, I swear!But now, on to the chapter you wrote! Absolutely stunning stuff, my own gut seemed to be shrinking when I was reading the latter half of the chapter... I know it's a cliche that I keep repeating to say that I can't wait until the next chapter, but I really can't. The tension between all of the characters is quite gripping.
Uh, which confrontation? If you're speaking of Ilire and Ajantis arguing in the last chapter (15), Jaheira isn't there (Ajantis asked her to leave them alone). Or are you speaking of the preceding chapter? But yes, I have a little trouble writing Jaheira. I have a little trouble what a stern mother would say to either Ilire or Ajantis in that situation. The only advice I could see her give is 'By the horns of Sylvanus, talk to each other and sort it out!'. Which they don't really need to hear... they already know that, they just don't know how to do it.Just one comment I have to say, though; I was surprised at how little Jaheira said during the confrontation. Then again, I can see her being silent when she thought it was needed and speaking her mind later. What do you think?
But in any case, thanks a lot for the review!
#31
Posted 27 May 2008 - 12:39 AM
Suffice to say, I'm definitely looking forwards to your next installment!
Through lightning, travel shadow,
Through hell and all above,
Surviving sword and arrow,
Bound stronger by the love
***
And in the end a witness,
To where the death has lain,
Silent through the sorrow,
Where innocents lie slain
#32
Posted 31 May 2008 - 05:23 PM
Hm. You're right about that, actually. Hm. I'll have to go back and see what I can do to make Jae more talkative.Hmm, I think I meant the chapter preceding, but that's all right.
Well, I did notice that I have trouble writing with lots of characters. Usually it's a select few stealing the scene, and Jaheira did in this chapter, which she didn't in the Ilire vs. Monsters confrontation. Anyway, thanks for the compliment As for cliffhangers... really? I've done a cliffhanger? Ah well. I'll let you hold your breath a while yet , it's Out of the Dark and the Mist's turn this weekI just wanted to commend you now on how well you did Jaheira this time! I thought the little part she had with Firkraag was wonderful, and your upping of the stakes with Conster and Ilire... damn cliffhangers! You well and truly got me hooked with that one, and the emotional developments with Keldorn and Ajantis were wonderful as well.
Suffice to say, I'm definitely looking forwards to your next installment!
#33
Posted 23 June 2008 - 03:53 PM
Through lightning, travel shadow,
Through hell and all above,
Surviving sword and arrow,
Bound stronger by the love
***
And in the end a witness,
To where the death has lain,
Silent through the sorrow,
Where innocents lie slain
#34
Posted 17 July 2008 - 04:13 PM
Sorry it took me so long to answer this...
Glad you liked the insights... next chapter will have more action, but the one after that should be all about insights.
And, as usual, thanks a lot for the review
#35
Posted 16 August 2008 - 10:31 PM
Through lightning, travel shadow,
Through hell and all above,
Surviving sword and arrow,
Bound stronger by the love
***
And in the end a witness,
To where the death has lain,
Silent through the sorrow,
Where innocents lie slain
#36
Posted 05 September 2008 - 07:58 AM
Wow, I managed to pull off a fighting scene alright! lol I'm sorry about Ajantis' arm, but he's got it all fixed by Anomen... I had to have him use his Heal spell, *evil grin* After all, what sort of a cliffhanger would I have made if Anomen would have been all fresh on healing spells?
I should work on the next chapter soon. Like this weekend, I hope, unless birding strikes me again. Considering they announced 10C and rain, fanfiction should be pretty safe, lol.
Thanks a lot for reviewing! (and for being so kind with it, too)
#37
Posted 15 October 2008 - 08:32 PM
And with the latest chapter... wow. Just wow, I must admit, I wasn't expecting this development (even though I might have hoped for it, heh... I don't know, but the way you've written Anomen makes him incredible). And I loved the little interlude by the stream... wow. You know, despite the breaks, I still am very caught up in this great story. Can't wait 'til the next chapter, DalreiDal .
Through lightning, travel shadow,
Through hell and all above,
Surviving sword and arrow,
Bound stronger by the love
***
And in the end a witness,
To where the death has lain,
Silent through the sorrow,
Where innocents lie slain
#38
Posted 06 November 2008 - 07:54 AM
Sorry for not answering sooner... the wonders of looking for a job kept me somewhat busy...
....I was having what might be politely described as mixed feelings when Ajantis and Ilire seemed to reconcile...
Uh-uh. So you wanted to strangle me, uh? So you disagreed with it? You sided with Anomen on that one?
And with the latest chapter... wow. Just wow, I must admit, I wasn't expecting this development (even though I might have hoped for it, heh... I don't know, but the way you've written Anomen makes him incredible). And I loved the little interlude by the stream... wow. You know, despite the breaks, I still am very caught up in this great story. Can't wait 'til the next chapter, DalreiDal .
I'm glad the little scene by the stream didn't come as too much of a violent turn-about but came across as understandable. The torment of the heart is not easy to explain and capture in simple words... Also, I promise I'll make an effort to put up the next chapter a little more quickly! I aim for next tuesday.
As always, a big big thank you for taking the time to review and to forgive me for the delays!
#39
Posted 08 November 2008 - 01:10 AM
Hey Shadowhawke!
Sorry for not answering sooner... the wonders of looking for a job kept me somewhat busy...
Oh, good luck with that. I'm sure you'll be fine, though.
....I was having what might be politely described as mixed feelings when Ajantis and Ilire seemed to reconcile...
Uh-uh. So you wanted to strangle me, uh? So you disagreed with it? You sided with Anomen on that one?
Heh, I wouldn't go so far as to say I wanted to strangle you . But I was a bit disappointed. That said, I think that says more about your engrossing and gripping writing than anything
I'm glad the little scene by the stream didn't come as too much of a violent turn-about but came across as understandable. The torment of the heart is not easy to explain and capture in simple words... Also, I promise I'll make an effort to put up the next chapter a little more quickly! I aim for next tuesday.
It came across as very understandable, I think you've explained it all very well. The way you've juxtaposed the two and shown Ilire's conflict is really very awe-inspiring. If I ever decide to write something like this, I'm going to take notes.
As always, a big big thank you for taking the time to review and to forgive me for the delays!
Pfeh. Nonsense, my friend. . There's nothing to forgive. Real life always comes before writing, and the fact that you're still at this makes me more happy than I can say.
Through lightning, travel shadow,
Through hell and all above,
Surviving sword and arrow,
Bound stronger by the love
***
And in the end a witness,
To where the death has lain,
Silent through the sorrow,
Where innocents lie slain
#40
Posted 20 November 2008 - 08:34 AM
So new chapter incoming, and thanks for comments