166 replies to this topic

[DalreïDal]

Hey! Don't poke me! It's not just because I'm a girl, listen to metal, and play roleplaying games that I deserve to be poked like the freak I am!!!

And besides, if you didn't want your signature to be spotted, you gotta choose something less classical than Manowar. Eh, even though metalheads often get the impression of being the only metalheads in the world, it is a grave misconception. I tell you, we're everywhere, and we can all spot Manowar's lyrics. Inimitable. Lol.

Edited by DalreïDal, 20 April 2007 - 08:08 PM.

[WeeRLegion]

Hey! Don't poke me! It's not just because I'm a girl, listen to metal, and play roleplaying games that I deserve to be poked like the freak I am!!!

And besides, if you didn't want your signature to be spotted, you gotta choose something less classical than Manowar. Eh, even though metalheads often get the impression of being the only metalheads in the world, it is a grave misconception. I tell you, we're everywhere, and we can all spot Manowar's lyrics. Inimitable. Lol.

*snicker snicker snicker*
Inimitable... *Snicker snicker*
Ist es fein.

Chapter XIV. Climbed up here?

Chama slept like a stone throughout the night.

Disguised author insertion?

When she woke the next morning, she was physically well, but restless. Moreover, her spells were flat, after two nights without convenient preparation, and the team was stuck in town for another day. There was no good excuse to exhaust herself at training and she could hear in her mind Drogan?s scolding voice anyway, ordering her sternly to take a rest once in a while.

She slipped out of her room, stepping silently over Deekin?s sleeping form and smiling fondly to herself. The kobold would have woken at the slightest sound but that of her footsteps; it seemed he could detect her presence through his slumber, because he hugged his crossbow closer and sighed contentedly in his sleep. He had grown wings while she was away, no doubt gaining assurance because of his responsibility to the kobolds he trained. She hoped his wings were symbolic for more than his bardic craft.

She moved to the temple?s main room, and asked one of the pages to find Nathyrra and Valen and tell them they had a day of freedom.

A day of freedom makes it sound like they'd be worked as slaves all other days.

After she took her armour to Rizolvir, she looked around for any idea of what to busy her day with, again hearing in her mind Drogan forbidding her to use her circlet and ring. A higher peak in the surrounding cliffs caught her eyes, and she realized she missed the forests. She had lived long in cities, so she was used to deny the pull, but that lonely outcropping of rock seemed like a place of quiet where she could feel some degree of communication with the ?nature? of the Underdark.

She walked to its feet, then around the base a while, looking up for the best route. She gave a last look around her, making sure no one was there to see her antics, and started to climb up the vertical face of rock.

Waait, the peak has feet, Isn't that at least one too many?

Soon she was panting and sweating comfortably, her body set into the rhythm of sustained exercise. The illusion of freedom she experienced when she climbed, suspended between earth and sky like this, was always a powerful call. She was careful not to give in to it as she had so many times before. She just climbed, peacefully tasting the pleasure of her skilful and graceful ascent.

Snivelll! Never free, Never me, So I dub thee unforgiven~

Well, she'd better not give into any illusions of freedom while dangling high above ground level... Or maybe above underground level.

But suddenly she heard something, and stopped, flattening herself against the cliff wall, straining her keen ears to try and identify the sound?s source. She recognized it almost immediately. Not many people in the Underdark had Valen?s height and bulk after all. She let out a sigh of relief not to have been caught by a hostile creature, alone and unarmed. By the sounds of his booted feet scraping the stony ground, his grunts of effort and the loud clinks of his armour, she knew he was training. She pondered briefly what to do, but it would have been foolishly risky, in her current state of fatigue, to climb down. So she started up once more.

When she arrived near the edge leading to a flat near the summit, she was faced with a zone of friable rock, so she had to move laterally until her holds were safe again. She was now in a very difficult place where the rock actually climbed steeper than the vertical, and her breathing soon came in a ragged whistling, her hands almost slippery with sweat.

Well, if anything, then "almost slippery" seems like a somewhat odd thing to note.
A little slippery, somewhat slippery, not slippery, slippery... etc. etc. then almost slippery... Hmmm...

It was a relief when she finally reached the edge. She dragged herself up, until the ledge of stone was comfortably under her elbows, and looked up to see Valen training. He was drenched in sweat too, swinging his heavy flail about, practicing his whirlwind attack against the air around him. The show ended exactly then, though, because Valen suddenly saw her, cried out in shock, and his flail went flying out of his hands.

?Chama! Why didn?t you cry out for help?? He was already next to her, grabbing her arms and pulling her up. In a careless display of strength, he grabbed her arms near the shoulder and lifted her completely, her feet dangling in the air, turned and made a few steps, then set her down on her feet, further from the edge. ?What were you doing there? How long have you been suspended like that? By all the devils of Baator, you?re shaking. How much longer were you planning to hold there??

Loved this scene, it's a misunderstanding I didn't see coming.

He guided Chama, stunned by all these words ? surely it was the longest discourse she had ever heard him make ? to a nearby bench, where he sat her down before fetching his flail a little further away. He stood in front of her, crossed his arms over his broad chest, and prompted, ?Well??

?I? felt like climbing.?

An expression of utter shock registered on Valen?s face. ?You climbed up here? Aren?t you aware there?s a trail? And why, in the name of the Nine Hells, did you do that??

She burst out laughing under his incensed glare. It was a hysteric attack of laughter. She rolled from side to side on her bench, then wiped her eyes of their tears and managed, ?Oh, by Mystra, you sound like master Drogan!?

"Wiped her eyes of their tears"? I don't know, It sounds kind of funny... Maybe something like "Wiped the tears from her eyes"?

Valen had not lost his countenance. ?Then I would surmise this master Drogan also urged you to show more wisdom in your actions.?

She sobered. ?He did, and I did listen to him? most of the time... not quite, but oh well, when it was really important. And you, what were you doing here??

He was surprised by the sudden turn of the conversation, finding himself on the receiving end of questions. ?I was training to pass the time. I volunteered for a turn of guard. This place is called the Lone Peak, and it?s a permanent watch post.?

Chama looked out at the landscape stretching out in the darkness below her.

?No advancing armies yet??

?No, but? I still would like to know? you really climbed up here??

She sighed. ?Yes. It looked like a quiet place with a view, so I decided to come take a look.?

He looked at her strangely. ?If you were drow, I would say you?re about half drider, walking on walls like that. You have a taste for danger.?

?This isn?t as dangerous as you make it sound. I know not to try myself against walls too hard for me.?

?I was sure you had fallen and were waiting there, suspended, for who knows how long.?

?Sorry to have worried you.?

With a start, he realized that it was true. He struggled for a second against his rebellious demon, and said, ?It?s alright, I just jumped to conclusions? but I guess I couldn?t expect to see someone arriving here by that road.? Then, to change the subject, ?Who is this master Drogan??

?One of my teachers in the magical arts. He used to train pupils in his house in Hilltop. I was one of them. While I was there, there was an aspirant paladin, Mischa; a dwarven thief, Durna; and a half-orc sorcerer, Xanos. Drogan? taught me much. I owe him a great deal.?

There was an air of melancholy on Chama?s face.

?I notice you speak of him in the past,? Valen remarked gently. ?Why is that??

?The obvious answer,? she sighed. ?He died.?

?I?m sorry. I can hear in your voice that you held him in great affection.?

?Yes, I did. And? thank you. It?s strange, but it?s the first time anyone expresses sympathies for my loss. He? he died so Durna and I could have passage in a portal we needed to cross to fulfill a mission given to us by the Harpers. He was one of them and he believed in their causes. He gave his life for them? and for us.?

...and I could have passage in a portal...

?A courageous man,? Valen praised. Chama nodded silently, looking off into the distance and wrapped in memories.

?I think? that he was to me what the Seer is to you and Nat? He brought me back from the brink, from the life I once led.? She paled and paused, looking away into the blackness. ?I hope you understand now how I could never betray the Seer.?

?My lady, please doubt my judgement of you no longer,? Valen said softly. ?I know? I trust you to fight loyally on our side, because I have come to know you as we have travelled together. I see that the Seer was right and my doubts, not founded. I didn?t need to know about Drogan to be convinced of this.?

Chama looked at him thoughtfully for a long time. ?Thank you, Valen, for your trust. I assure you that I will do everything within my power not to disappoint you. The Valsharess will be dealt with.?

?And I assure you that I will do everything within my power to help you.?

Chama stood and extended a hand that was still slightly shaking from exhaustion. ?Then we are agreed for a new beginning.? She smiled wryly. ?On better footing, I hope.?

He smiled and shook her hand in his big paw, with his fierce strength. ?Agreed, my lady.?

Ahmmm... Quite possibly it seems that he shook her hand with his big paw... O_O
But I wouldn't know, "in his big paw" just sounds, so, loose... But maybe it's just me.
Yes, it probably is just me...

A young drow suddenly appeared on the plateau, on the side opposite to the cliff; he was obviously the next watcher, and he arrived just in time to see them shaking hands.

?I think I?d take the trail now,? Chama grinned. ?Would you show me the path??

Valen gestured her ahead and nodded to the guard as they passed by him. They were a bit further down the trail when Chama spoke up.

?You know I had a strange vision of you while I was in the fever?s grip??

Valen blushed and chuckled. ?Really??

?I saw you with a bird?s features.?

He frowned, puzzled. ?A bird? The feathers and wings??

?Not exactly. More the beak, eyes and horns? you reminded me of a great horned owl.?

He lifted a pensive eyebrow. He would usually take great offence at being compared to an animal, but he found no objection against owls. They did not strike as feral and enraged.

?I?m telling you because I know sooner or later I will call you Granduc without noticing.?

?Granduc??

?The elven name for the great horned owl. It must have been subconscious, but it fits you so well that I can?t help but think of you with that name now.?

Valen didn?t exactly know what to answer.

?I wouldn?t mind such a name, I think.?

Chama nodded and blushed. They walked the rest of the path in silence.

Thou art Birdie, on this day I have named thee.



I liked the scene(chapter) overall, very well painted! B)

[Shadowhawke]

Hey DalreiDal! Glad to hear you've gotten out of your Biology ordeal alive. . And, of course, I really like the chapter . Valen and Chama were awesome again, although to be honest, I would like a bit more explanation of Master Drogan's death. As WeeRLegion pointed out, this whole passage through a portal thing didn't make too much sense... at least to me anyway. Sorry

By the way, another very small thing. I shall take your advice and blame it on your lack of sleep .

I see that the Seer was right and my doubts, not founded.

You *could* technically say that your doubts were not founded, but most people tend to just say 'my doubts were unfounded'.

Other than that, I did really like it. . Although that whole paw thing shook me. Valen has paws?

Great chapter overall, DalreiDal. I hope more is forthcoming.

[DalreïDal]

Hey, 2 reviews in no time! Thanks!!!

Hey! Don't poke me! It's not just because I'm a girl, listen to metal, and play roleplaying games that I deserve to be poked like the freak I am!!!

And besides, if you didn't want your signature to be spotted, you gotta choose something less classical than Manowar. Eh, even though metalheads often get the impression of being the only metalheads in the world, it is a grave misconception. I tell you, we're everywhere, and we can all spot Manowar's lyrics. Inimitable. Lol.

*snicker snicker snicker*
Inimitable... *Snicker snicker*
Ist es fein.

Sorry... I don't speak German... or whatever language this is in. What was that?

Chapter XIV. Climbed up here?

Chama slept like a stone throughout the night.

Disguised author insertion?

Absolutely not. Categorically not. Although it's some strange coincidence that my character and I almost died at the same time (her, literally, and me, figuratively) and therefore ended up needing loooon nights of sleep at the same time. But I swear, hey, wouldn't you sleep a lot too if you'd been poisonned 3 times with a CON stat of 8???

She moved to the temple?s main room, and asked one of the pages to find Nathyrra and Valen and tell them they had a day of freedom.

A day of freedom makes it sound like they'd be worked as slaves all other days.

Er, alright, point taken. But I though that "having a day off" was a neologism that would stick out in a piece like this. Any suggestions for replacing the "day of freedom" phrase?

Waait, the peak has feet, Isn't that at least one too many?

Well, you know the cliff holds a kind of cleave in the middle that makes it look like it's two parts... Doesn't that count for two feet? No? Oh well, at least I defended myself

Soon she was panting and sweating comfortably, her body set into the rhythm of sustained exercise. The illusion of freedom she experienced when she climbed, suspended between earth and sky like this, was always a powerful call. She was careful not to give in to it as she had so many times before. She just climbed, peacefully tasting the pleasure of her skilful and graceful ascent.

Snivelll! Never free, Never me, So I dub thee unforgiven~

Well, she'd better not give into any illusions of freedom while dangling high above ground level... Or maybe above underground level.

I don't recommend her doing so either, so she'll probably keep her head cool

Well, if anything, then "almost slippery" seems like a somewhat odd thing to note.
A little slippery, somewhat slippery, not slippery, slippery... etc. etc. then almost slippery... Hmmm...

Alright... so it's "slightly slippery" now... better?

?Chama! Why didn?t you cry out for help?? He was already next to her, grabbing her arms and pulling her up. In a careless display of strength, he grabbed her arms near the shoulder and lifted her completely, her feet dangling in the air, turned and made a few steps, then set her down on her feet, further from the edge. ?What were you doing there? How long have you been suspended like that? By all the devils of Baator, you?re shaking. How much longer were you planning to hold there??

Loved this scene, it's a misunderstanding I didn't see coming.

Well, do you expect our tin can tiefling to be able to figure that someone can CLIMB the lone peak? He's got to figure out some explanation within the limits of his own imagination for Chama's presence at the edge...

"Wiped her eyes of their tears"? I don't know, It sounds kind of funny... Maybe something like "Wiped the tears from her eyes"?

.......right.

...and I could have passage in a portal...

I swore I wouldn't do this anymore, didn't I? *sigh* See complete answer later, in my response to Shadowhawke's message.

Ahmmm... Quite possibly it seems that he shook her hand with his big paw...
But I wouldn't know, "in his big paw" just sounds, so, loose... But maybe it's just me.
Yes, it probably is just me...

Again, see later, in my response to Shadowhawke.

Thou art Birdie, on this day I have named thee.

You ever saw a great horned owl? It looks a little too irritable, with its yellow hard eyes and white puff of feathers on the chin and chest, for the name "birdie" to spring to mind when you look at it Although I understand your feeling, lol. I hope you don't think I removed too much dignity from Valen with that nickname.

Thanks, WeeRLegion, for the constructive feedback I'm glad you take the time for those reviews.

Hey DalreiDal! Glad to hear you've gotten out of your Biology ordeal alive.

barely, but hey, how would I manage to lose weight if it wasn't for crazy end of sessions??? lol

And, of course, I really like the chapter . Valen and Chama were awesome again, although to be honest, I would like a bit more explanation of Master Drogan's death. As WeeRLegion pointed out, this whole passage through a portal thing didn't make too much sense... at least to me anyway. Sorry

OK, since that's 2 people in 2 who point that out, that's no doubt a problem. And I swore I wouldn't do that anymore, and I even paused after revising that chapter and wondered to myself if I'd done it again and thought not, since Chama and Valen just climbed the Lone Peak and went back down. Sorry. Master Drogan is a quest-giver NPC in Shadows of Undrentide, the 1st expansion of NWN, the one coming before HotU. Since I don't feel like going back to write it all in my chapter, what happens in that game *************SPOILER ALERT******************* is that you are a student of Drogan at the beginning of the module. His house gets attacked, ancient artifacts in the care of the Harpers get stolen, and you are sent to retrieve them. On your way, you discover that the artifacts are stolen by a medusa, Heurodis (I think), who plan to make Undrentide, ancient city of Netheril, rise again from the sands of Anauroch. I don't remember very well, but at some point Drogan gets poisonned and has the choice to either cross the portal alone, save his life and let Heurodis go with the artifacts unmolested, or keep the portal open, die and you and your sidekick (for Chama, that was Durna) can cross. So his choice is to let you go after Heurodis and sacrifice himself. So that is the portal thing I spoke about. *******************SPOILER ALERT: END**************

Did that satisfy your curiosity?

By the way, another very small thing. I shall take your advice and blame it on your lack of sleep.

I see that the Seer was right and my doubts, not founded.

You *could* technically say that your doubts were not founded, but most people tend to just say 'my doubts were unfounded'.

Well, that wasn't the sleep's fault. It's that "unfounded" doesn't even exist in French, so naturally I think of it in "not founded" terms. But it's fixed now, and thanks for pointing it out

Other than that, I did really like it. Although that whole paw thing shook me. Valen has paws?

Sorry, that was probably a lousy metaphor if 2 out of 2 people bug on it. By paws, I mean reeeeeeeeeal big hands. Again French must be showing through. Doesn't the equivalen exist in English? If not, I should simply say "shook her hand in his big hand?" or can I say "shook her hand in his big one?" Thanks for pointing it out, and more thanks if you think of some way to make it right

Thanks to take the time to review, Shadowhawke

[WeeRLegion]

*snicker snicker snicker*
Inimitable... *Snicker snicker*
Ist es fein.

Sorry... I don't speak German... or whatever language this is in. What was that?

It's German and should be something like "It is fine". Dunno, just felt like putting it there.

With the whole "inimitable" thingy, it all reminded me of some rather sarcastic critique I read concerning the lyrics of the "Die For Metal" piece... *snicker snicker*

Absolutely not. Categorically not. Although it's some strange coincidence that my character and I almost died at the same time (her, literally, and me, figuratively) and therefore ended up needing loooon nights of sleep at the same time. But I swear, hey, wouldn't you sleep a lot too if you'd been poisonned 3 times with a CON stat of 8???

I wouldn't know, I've got at least 16.
Oh, wait...

Er, alright, point taken. But I though that "having a day off" was a neologism that would stick out in a piece like this. Any suggestions for replacing the "day of freedom" phrase?

Err, ehh... I dunno. How's about a day for phrenological examinations?

Well, you know the cliff holds a kind of cleave in the middle that makes it look like it's two parts... Doesn't that count for two feet? No? Oh well, at least I defended myself

So make it the cloven hoof of the cliff then.

Thanks, WeeRLegion, for the constructive feedback I'm glad you take the time for those reviews.

My pleasure.

[Celestine]

The last chapter is an enjoyable read. Sorry, I took so long to review, still swarmed and struggling with short attention spans lately. I'm glad to see Valen and Chama getting along now. Btw, using 'paw' to describe Valen's hand reminds me of a bear, I don't know why. But then Valen's physique kinda resembles a bear - he being tall and bulky.

[DalreïDal]

*snicker snicker snicker*
Inimitable... *Snicker snicker*
Ist es fein.

Sorry... I don't speak German... or whatever language this is in. What was that?

It's German and should be something like "It is fine". Dunno, just felt like putting it there.

With the whole "inimitable" thingy, it all reminded me of some rather sarcastic critique I read concerning the lyrics of the "Die For Metal" piece... *snicker snicker*

And have you taken a look at "Brothers of Metal"?!?!? Come on, where are WE sisters of metal accounted for!?!?!? Pfeh! AND DON'T POKE ME!!!!!!!!!!

Er, alright, point taken. But I though that "having a day off" was a neologism that would stick out in a piece like this. Any suggestions for replacing the "day of freedom" phrase?

Err, ehh... I dunno. How's about a day for phrenological examinations?

Er, well, somehow I don't imagine Valen submitting to that. With the horns he'd just mess the data anyway.

The last chapter is an enjoyable read. Sorry, I took so long to review, still swarmed and struggling with short attention spans lately. I'm glad to see Valen and Chama getting along now. Btw, using 'paw' to describe Valen's hand reminds me of a bear, I don't know why. But then Valen's physique kinda resembles a bear - he being tall and bulky.

Hey Celestine! Nice to see you've read and reviewed this Well, Valen and Chama get along, but there's gonna be a few bumps along the road still to keep things interesting. At least I hope so. Eh Thanks for the review

[WeeRLegion]

And have you taken a look at "Brothers of Metal"?!?!? Come on, where are WE sisters of metal accounted for!?!?!? Pfeh! AND DON'T POKE ME!!!!!!!!!!

Ehhehh...
You really keep asking for it then...

Spoiler

Spoiler

Edited by WeeRLegion, 24 April 2007 - 12:05 AM.

[DalreïDal]

*sigh* Metal girls gotta learn to stand alone, it seems. And we get poked on top of it.






(Just in case you're thinking I'm a very dull, boring, and stick-in-the-mud, this was a joke.)

[WeeRLegion]

Hehheh.
Try looking at those poker smilies for a while while listening to Iron Maiden's The Trooper.
Or something.


Errhmmm, now I would never think anyone would use a smiley right after being serious, no ma'am (sp? ( )).


And, you know, brothers of metal... Well Manowar is such an feminist activist group anyway.
Have you by chance seen any of their stage shows? Hurkk...
Now I do think they've got a kickass sound to it all, but their "true metal behaviour" is kind of... ...distasteful, sometimes.

[DalreïDal]

About Manowar: totally agreed. That's power metal in all its ridiculous exagerated overglory... But still manages to make us like that sound. And while we're speaking of metal, my metal-song-quoting friend, can't you spot where "Out of the dark and the mist" comes from??? I should think you'd have made the connection by now...

Ridin fast out of the sunset,
Devils and horses advance,
Thunder and lightning and honour,
The army of saber and lance,
Every man somber and focused,
Each man looks to the fore,
Death is the life we are living,
Hungry for battle and war,
War for War, saber in every fist,
Where we were and are once more,
Out of the dark and the mist

Doesn't that seem composed especially for Valen to you? It certainly inspired me the half of the prologue that was dedicated to Valen.

So that's this week's quizz: where do those lyrics come from???

Edited by DalreïDal, 03 May 2007 - 08:49 AM.

[WeeRLegion]

Hehhehheh.
I'll confess to being a fairly recent "convert", I probably couldn't ID half the lyrics you could recite from memory.

But those lyrics, the themes definitely seem Manowarish, but it might be a random similarity...
At least I don't recall hearing that song, and I don't recall reading those lyrics either, and I've done a good bit of both with Manowar songs.
And there is a certain non Manowar quality to it all...
Alas, I fear I can't pinpoint the source without googling.


But yeah, it does seem to suit a semibloodthirsty demidemon quite well.

[DalreïDal]

Eh, I'm starting not to be such a recent convert myself, but that must be because I'm about to hit my mid-twenties Too bad you don't know that song though. You were right, however, about it not being Manowarish. A little too bloodthirsty for our glory-singing Manowar, isn't it? It's from War for War, by Motorhead. I don't like Motorhead quite so much, to be honest, but I absolutely love War for War. You should try that song some time, it's built like a military march (alright, not a REAL march, but almost), and you should also take a look at the lyrics, they're worth it. Totally chaotic evil if you ask me

Another fine example:
We are the worst of the best now

I'm not too much into quoting lyrics from memory, but Manowar are kinda hearable and understandable, and their song structure is usually simple enough that the words are catchy and stick in memory. In fact it was a draw of luck that I could identify your signature

And I use the opportunity to announce that our semibloodthirsty demidemon is going to get his fifteen minutes in the spotlight this weekend, I promise.

[WeeRLegion]

Eh, I'm starting not to be such a recent convert myself, but that must be because I'm about to hit my mid-twenties Too bad you don't know that song though. You were right, however, about it not being Manowarish. A little too bloodthirsty for our glory-singing Manowar, isn't it? It's from War for War, by Motorhead. I don't like Motorhead quite so much, to be honest, but I absolutely love War for War. You should try that song some time, it's built like a military march (alright, not a REAL march, but almost), and you should also take a look at the lyrics, they're worth it. Totally chaotic evil if you ask me

Another fine example:
We are the worst of the best now

I'm not too much into quoting lyrics from memory, but Manowar are kinda hearable and understandable, and their song structure is usually simple enough that the words are catchy and stick in memory. In fact it was a draw of luck that I could identify your signature

And I use the opportunity to announce that our semibloodthirsty demidemon is going to get his fifteen minutes in the spotlight this weekend, I promise.

I don't think it's the bloodthirst... I mean, manowar does have a good handful of bloodthirsty songs.
(ex. Dark Avenger, Hail and kill...)
But I think you hit the nail on the head with mentioning their simple song structure, there's something too flowing about those lyrics to be Manowar.
... And yeah, they're kind of colder, Manowar lyrics are either determined, rampant, heroic, solemn, hopeful, inspiring... anything, but those are quite simply "dark".
Actually I think that's one of the reasons I like Manow.; their songs are never depressed.
Not that there's anything wrong with a bit of depressedness every now and then, energetic stuff just usually is more listenable in the long run.

Motorhead? Hmm, i think they have a few nice songs, but the vocalist dude is somewhat too whiskey-voiced to be among my favs.
I prefer people like (ahem...) E. Adams, R.J. Dio... Till Lindemann, and, and... well, generally relatively clear voiced people, death grunts really don't work for me at all.
No, wait, take that back, I do like the trollish growling this support singer guy at epica does... Definitely my favourite grunter.


***

15 minutes, eh? Goodie good.
I'm waiting, or rather, biding my time with other activities till THE time comes.

[DalreïDal]

I don't think it's the bloodthirst... I mean, manowar does have a good handful of bloodthirsty songs.
(ex. Dark Avenger, Hail and kill...)

Right, bloodthirsty was an ill-chosen word. I meant, maybe, battle-hungry? Hm, not quite. Reveling in chaos and death and gore? More like it

But I think you hit the nail on the head with mentioning their simple song structure, there's something too flowing about those lyrics to be Manowar.
... And yeah, they're kind of colder, Manowar lyrics are either determined, rampant, heroic, solemn, hopeful, inspiring... anything, but those are quite simply "dark".
Actually I think that's one of the reasons I like Manow.; their songs are never depressed.
Not that there's anything wrong with a bit of depressedness every now and then, energetic stuff just usually is more listenable in the long run.

A true power metal fan I see As for me, stuff doesn't have to be energetic, just plain melodic does the trick for me, it can be as depressed as it likes. Actually I like a lot of doom&cie metal bands (Paradise Lost the-ever-classical-example, Therion, Tiamat, Candlemass (LET ME DIE IN SOLITUDE!!! became my anthem this winter...)), so depressing isn't an issue for me, much more melody.

Motorhead? Hmm, i think they have a few nice songs, but the vocalist dude is somewhat too whiskey-voiced to be among my favs.

Yep, me too. But you should try War for War, for once his voice really fits and it's not their usual "Dr Love" sound.

I prefer people like (ahem...) E. Adams, R.J. Dio... Till Lindemann, and, and... well, generally relatively clear voiced people, death grunts really don't work for me at all.
No, wait, take that back, I do like the trollish growling this support singer guy at epica does... Definitely my favourite grunter.

Yes, the guy does a nice grunt. Do you know Tristania? Another fine female singer & support grunter (and a third singer, male clean voice as bonus). And finally, there's Opeth, the guy can sing like a tenor but more often growls like a monster cookie, but for some unexplainable reason my ears can tolerate it. Maybe it would be worth a try for you if you like Epica's grunter, although Tristania's probably a surer value.

15 minutes, eh? Goodie good.
I'm waiting, or rather, biding my time with other activities till THE time comes.

It's done! It's time! Be ready!

[WeeRLegion]

Hmmm, what have we here then...

Chapter XV. Nightly troubles
They explored around Drearing?s Deep that day. This small village west of Lith My?athar was filled with self-proclaimed ?free people? who acted like nothing but slaves and appeared harmless enough, but Nathyrra was positive that the undead legions of the Valsharess originated from this unseemly settlement. Chama?s team discovered a worrisome temple at one end of town, and they decided to take a night of rest before they went in. The group of adventurers left the town to set up a camp, afraid to attract attention from the temple if they spent the night too close to it. Valen and Chama waited while Nathyrra scouted around, and finally the drow came back and guided them to a hollow in the rock with an easily concealed entrance.

An idea struck me here, maybe for the NON-NWN people around here it would be nice to get some kind of compass directions and such along with the locations, to get a better idea of where the party is at.

***

Ehhehh, a good bit of fluent writing there, I don't feel the need to unnecessarily quote it here.
Nicely ponderous and such, it might be partially due to it being past 12 o'clock in the midnight here, but i do think the scene gives a good picture of thoughs drifting slowly on a boring nightwatch.

Valen put a hand on her shoulder. ?I understand. I don?t like to expose my past at all times either.? He looked at her intently, the nervousness and fear and torment written in her eyes. ?I know it must sound strange coming from one such as me, but? I offer advice, if you will hear me out, my lady??

She chuckled. ?You have no idea how many people tried to ?advise? me. I have found that good advice is scarce and comes from unexpected people. So? what advice do you offer??

?I have no good advice to offer on my own. I just wanted to suggest talking to the Seer.?

She looked at him strangely. ?The Seer??

?Yes. She? is a friend to me. It is surprising how she can put me at peace with myself when I am? tempted by the infernal part of me. I think she could calm you, even if your uneasiness does not sprout from a demonic half.? He smiled faintly.

?I always think of her as the leader, but I should not forget that she must be very wise to be her goddess?s seer. I? will think on your suggestion, Granduc. Thank you.?

Caw! Caw! Err, no, I guess that's not the sound that an owl would make... But errm, I don't know, does it really fit in with the otherwise serious content of the sentence to have her call Valen an owl?
Well, I don't know...

Valen blushed slightly at the nickname, but nodded and, after one last pat on her shoulder, went to take his post near the entrance for his turn of guard. He sat in the entrance of their rocky hollow and had to resist the urge to turn around and look at Chama. He was sad to see her like this. He wished she would talk to him about what troubled her; after all, after a bit of insistence on her part, he had told her about his demonic master Grimash?t and his escape from the armies of the Abyss. Then Valen heaved a loud sigh. He had not really insisted, had he? He had not even offered to hear her out. Eventually, he turned around to look at her. She was curled into a ball, lying on her side and her back on him. It was impossible to tell if she was asleep or not. He had his head turned, trying to judge from the rhythm of her breathing if she was sleeping, when someone hit him on the head from behind.

He merely grunted as he was knocked off his seat, his ears ringing like a cathedral?s bell and blackness threatening to engulf him. He shook his head, trying to clear the black from his vision, just in time to see a vicious-looking drow male, violet eyes alight with a dark flame, taking a run-up for his two-handed dire mace to smash his skull.

Valen rolled aside quickly, already tensing to push himself to his feet despite the ringing and dizziness, when suddenly there was a loud roar and a great yellow light. A fireball flew past him to smash into the assassin?s chest. The drow flew back under the impact, leaving Valen with a split second to spring to his feet and evaluate the situation.

Chama had not been asleep ? that much was obvious, since she had cast so quickly. Amidst the darkness clouding his vision, Valen could discern eight enemies: the male warrior, and seven Red Sisters. He blinked a few times, steadying his battle stance and his grip of his weapon.

The drow warrior got back to his feet, brushing is armour in a studied gesture of indifference. Looking at it more closely, Chama could see it was made from dragon?s scales. Avoid elemental damage against this one, she noted to herself. At least the fireball had been useful by the force of its physical blow.

The drow spoke. ?So. What have we here? None other than the very one who hampered the attack efforts in Undermountain, it appears. We have been looking for you for a while, elven female, but we certainly did not expect you to fall right into our hands.?

?I?m not down and dead yet,? Chama answered calmly.

?Be careful, Chama. I know Eldath, this male, and he is very dangerous,? Nathyrra whispered in her leader?s ear.

The elf nodded, indicating she was taking the warning very seriously. ?Hold Valen?s left,? she muttered in answer.

Nathyrra moved; Valen was obviously in no fit state to hold the first line alone. After one last challenge by Chama, Eldath and his accomplices pounced down upon Valen and Nathyrra.

The tiefling held his ground as best he could, wrestling with dizziness and sickness much more than with his enemies, fighting to the best of his impaired skill to keep Nathyrra safe from Eldath?s hits. To his relief, Chama kept breaking the attackers? lines with fireballs, and soon the Red Sisters were as confused and hurt as Valen. The mage finished the battle quickly with one of those volleys of magical projectiles of glowing energy, burning holes in the drows? chests.

Hey, congratulations, that looks like a nice fighting scene! You made it!
Only one small point I'll point out and that is the casual/nochalant/something last sentence; with one of those volleys of magical projectiles, it kind of tastes like disinterest and breaks the otherwise fine intensity of the scene.
But yeah, job well done.


Ehhmmm... Now this'll be very much unlike me, but I'll have to break it here, I don't think I caught anything I would even want to make fun of on my first read through!
I think the chapter does a nice job at bringing background for Chams and is generally nicely written... Hmmm...
Well, my the time of the day might be placing something of a penalty on my critical eye, but uhm, maybe that's not so horrible every once in a while.



As for...

A true power metal fan I see wink.gif As for me, stuff doesn't have to be energetic, just plain melodic does the trick for me, it can be as depressed as it likes. Actually I like a lot of doom&cie metal bands (Paradise Lost the-ever-classical-example, Therion, Tiamat, Candlemass (LET ME DIE IN SOLITUDE!!! became my anthem this winter...)), so depressing isn't an issue for me, much more melody.

Well, I wouldn't call myself a powermetal fan in general anyhow. I can name more bands of the genre that I'll rather laugh at than listen to.
[i]Like... Hammerfall, gahh, that vocalist somehow makes me think of the word "Nasal", and I have a stinging feeling that that is not positive... And the finnish Teräsbetoni... Don't get me started... They don't even look the part... x_x
Now Blindguardian, another bigger show of the genre, they have some good stuff, some not so good stuff... Well, I'll refrain from making any general comments about them...

I do enjoy a good deal of melodic stuff too... But I guess power stuff is something like the place I started from, so for now I'm mostly familiar with some of the bands of that genre.

Yep, me too. smile.gif But you should try War for War, for once his voice really fits and it's not their usual "Dr Love" sound.

I will, once I get myself to it, for now... WoW calls...

Yes, the guy does a nice grunt. Do you know Tristania? Another fine female singer & support grunter (and a third singer, male clean voice as bonus). And finally, there's Opeth, the guy can sing like a tenor but more often growls like a monster cookie, but for some unexplainable reason my ears can tolerate it. Maybe it would be worth a try for you if you like Epica's grunter, although Tristania's probably a surer value.

Tristania? She is somehow connected to a certain Gothminister project maybe? Or maybe she just did a gig with them, dunno...
Not really familiar, with her anyway.

It's done! It's time! Be ready! devil.gif

Maybe I should have quoted this little piece in the very beginning... Hmm...

[Shadowhawke]

Gah! Sorry, DalreiDal, I wrote a long comment here before, but it seems to have somehow screwed up. Just saying, you might want to go through your latest chapter with a fine-toothed comb on grammar. But I really liked your new addition; especially the interaction between Chama and Valen! (Yes, I seem to be fated to say that ). I wonder if Chama will ever find out just why Valen was distracted? Heh. Wonderful stuff, and I look forwards to seeing more of it, and more of Irony of Fate too!

[DalreïDal]

Hey, thanks for the reviews On this bleak sunny Monday (bleak being the prospect of the mountain of work to be climbed today and sunny being the indifferent weather), it's good to see two reviews...

An idea struck me here, maybe for the NON-NWN people around here it would be nice to get some kind of compass directions and such along with the locations, to get a better idea of where the party is at.

Did you mean that what I put there is a good idea, or that I should expand it?

Ehhehh, a good bit of fluent writing there, I don't feel the need to unnecessarily quote it here.
Nicely ponderous and such, it might be partially due to it being past 12 o'clock in the midnight here, but i do think the scene gives a good picture of thoughs drifting slowly on a boring nightwatch.

Eh, thanks. *patting myself on the back a little with relief* I put a lot of effort into writing that... I was afraid it might be too confusing and obtuse. Thanks for commenting on it and letting me know my efforts haven't gone to waste

?I always think of her as the leader, but I should not forget that she must be very wise to be her goddess?s seer. I? will think on your suggestion, Granduc. Thank you.?

Caw! Caw! Err, no, I guess that's not the sound that an owl would make... But errm, I don't know, does it really fit in with the otherwise serious content of the sentence to have her call Valen an owl?
Well, I don't know...

An owl wouldn't make any sound at all, except during mating season, but you don't want me to go there, do you? And she's not calling Valen an owl. She's calling him intense-eyed-irritable-looking-bird-of-prey. With a comfortable-looking chest. But we're not there yet either. I kinda see your point, but Granduc is officially Chama's nickname for Valen, so you might want to get used to seeing it at the craziest of places

Hey, congratulations, that looks like a nice fighting scene! You made it!

Wow, true, I hadn't seen it this way. Hey, I did write a fighting scene! Yay! Lol.

Only one small point I'll point out and that is the casual/nochalant/something last sentence; with one of those volleys of magical projectiles, it kind of tastes like disinterest and breaks the otherwise fine intensity of the scene.
But yeah, job well done.

I'll get on that right away... just give me a few minutes.

Ehhmmm... Now this'll be very much unlike me, but I'll have to break it here, I don't think I caught anything I would even want to make fun of on my first read through!
I think the chapter does a nice job at bringing background for Chams and is generally nicely written... Hmmm...
Well, my the time of the day might be placing something of a penalty on my critical eye, but uhm, maybe that's not so horrible every once in a while.

Don't worry, I still think your critical eye did a nice job Thank you, thank you, for your thoughtful review.

Jumping to off-topic now.

Well, I wouldn't call myself a powermetal fan in general anyhow. I can name more bands of the genre that I'll rather laugh at than listen to.

Like... Hammerfall, gahh, that vocalist somehow makes me think of the word "Nasal", and I have a stinging feeling that that is not positive... And the finnish Teräsbetoni... Don't get me started... They don't even look the part... x_x
Now Blindguardian, another bigger show of the genre, they have some good stuff, some not so good stuff... Well, I'll refrain from making any general comments about them...

I do enjoy a good deal of melodic stuff too... But I guess power stuff is something like the place I started from, so for now I'm mostly familiar with some of the bands of that genre.

LOL, isn't power where we ALL come in? It's a kind of easy and listenable start. I know Hammerfall and I tend to classify them in my head in the same folder as Manowar for all their overexagerated everything and classical sound, but I'm not allergic as you seem to be. I don't know Teräsbetoni at all, although their name, if it was derived from French, would be highly hilarious. As for Blindguardian, I have absolutely no complaint to offer since I saw them live

Tristania? She is somehow connected to a certain Gothminister project maybe? Or maybe she just did a gig with them, dunno...
Not really familiar, with her anyway.

Tristania is a group, with three singers. I have no idea if the woman, which name escapes me at the moment, was ever related to Gothminister. I just know she's got a very, very nice voice, and she's backed by a clean tenor and another nice grunter of Epica's league. You should try that too, after War for War, when WoW doesn't call so strongly

OK, now it's Shadowhawke's turn to receive my infinite gratitude

Gah! Sorry, DalreiDal, I wrote a long comment here before, but it seems to have somehow screwed up. Just saying, you might want to go through your latest chapter with a fine-toothed comb on grammar. But I really liked your new addition; especially the interaction between Chama and Valen! (Yes, I seem to be fated to say that ). I wonder if Chama will ever find out just why Valen was distracted? Heh. Wonderful stuff, and I look forwards to seeing more of it, and more of Irony of Fate too!

Hey, thanks for the review I'm sorry about your comment being screwed up, I know it's infuriating. Ah, Chama and Valen interaction is the subject of this piece of fiction... you'll be seeing more of it, don't worry. But I don't think Chama will ever find out why Valen was distracted, although it could make a nice scene, lol. Next week there'll be more of Irony of Fate to read, I promise

[WeeRLegion]

LOL, isn't power where we ALL come in? It's a kind of easy and listenable start. I know Hammerfall and I tend to classify them in my head in the same folder as Manowar for all their overexagerated everything and classical sound, but I'm not allergic as you seem to be. I don't know Teräsbetoni at all, although their name, if it was derived from French, would be highly hilarious. As for Blindguardian, I have absolutely no complaint to offer since I saw them live

Teräsbetoni is actually Finnish and means "Reinforced Concrete", a name chosen for it's hardiness... How lame is that? X_x

Tristania is a group, with three singers. I have no idea if the woman, which name escapes me at the moment, was ever related to Gothminister. I just know she's got a very, very nice voice, and she's backed by a clean tenor and another nice grunter of Epica's league. You should try that too, after War for War, when WoW doesn't call so strongly

I ran a search for War for War on youtube, came up with nothing, i'll try other places still...

Tristania however brought up something.
They seem to have a nice sound, just maybe a bit slowgoing for my taste.
I made the gothminister connection by a vague reference I picked up from somewhere, so don't mind that...


Edit: Oh, maybe I'll include this just for... fun. Link

Edited by WeeRLegion, 07 May 2007 - 02:22 PM.

[DalreïDal]

Teräsbetoni is actually Finnish and means "Reinforced Concrete", a name chosen for it's hardiness... How lame is that? X_x

Lol, that is exactly how it would sound like in French. In fact, it sounded like "Courtyard made of concrete". We're agreed for the "lame" part

I ran a search for War for War on youtube, came up with nothing, i'll try other places still...

I recommend it, it's worth it

Tristania however brought up something.
They seem to have a nice sound, just maybe a bit slowgoing for my taste.
I made the gothminister connection by a vague reference I picked up from somewhere, so don't mind that...

Yes, slowgoing would be a possibility... I DID mention I'm a doom metal fan, didn't I?

Edit: Oh, maybe I'll include this just for... fun. Link

What? Making fun of Rammstein? Apart from the lousy cover art, the unskilled singer, the boring guitars, and everything, what's wrong with them?