Interesting story. They have some sort of love/hate, hate/hate thing going there huh? I'm looking forward to seeing where you will take this.
Now, if I may nitpick a little.
While a good read, some parts appear to be a bit disjointed. Almost as if you have two or three things you are trying to say and you are cramming them into one paragraph. Some thoughts are not finished before you start a new one, and it jars the picture in my mind and forces me to create a new one. (Am I making any sense? Didn't think so! 
) Here's a few examples.Anyhow Imoen helped me escaped and we found Jaheira and Minsc in Irenicus' dungeon. Oh, the man's name is Jon Irenicus. Why does he want me to have my power I do not know, nor do I care. I *will* pay him back for the damage he has done, but some days I just don?t know if I will be able to handle killing more people. Though it haunts my mind what I want to do to him. I won?t tell you, I doubt you would like it.
It was this man who kill Khalid. Poor Khalid, I cared for him like a brother. It was always fun to walk up behind him and go "Boo!" and watch him jump. My friends had come looking for me, and I bring everyone so much pain. We escaped Irenicus' dungeon and we found ourselves in Athkatla and Imoen used magic against Irenicus and some fools called the Cowled Wizards took them both away!
You start off the sentence with a reference to Irenicus that is left over from the previous paragraph. Although you mention the killing of Khalid, the sentence is about Irenicus. Then you switch to Khalid for two sentences, then over to Anni, then the escape from the dungeon. In this case, I would start a new paragraph with each new topic, making certain there is a connecting sentence from the previous paragraph.
So...If I may be so bold...
Anyhow, Imoen helped me escaped and we found Jaheira and Minsc in Irenicus' dungeon.
Oh! Did I mention that the man's name is Jon Irenicus? Why he wants me to have my power I do not know, nor do I care. All I know is that I *will* pay him back for the damage he has done!
But, oh Father! Some days I just don?t know if I will be able to handle killing more people! Even though it haunts my mind what I want to do to him.
I won?t tell you, I doubt you would like it.
I mentioned earlier about losing Khalid? Well, it was this man who kill him. Poor Khalid, I cared for him like a brother. It was always fun to walk up behind him and go "Boo!" and watch him jump. He never got angry at me when I did it either. He would just turn and scold me for being a scamp, but you could see the affection in his eyes when he did it.
He was with the others when they came looking for me, but he never made it out again.
I bring everyone so much pain. (honestly, I would remove this sentence. It belongs elsewhere)
When we finally escaped Irenicus' dungeon, we found ourselves in Athkatla. It was there that, in an effort to stop Irenicus Imoen used magic against him, which caused a large amount of destruction in a portion of the city.
It was then that some fools called the Cowled Wizards showed up andtook them both away!
The stuff in bold are just my suggestions and you can tell me you hate them if you like.
Either way, I really do hope to see more of this story in the near future.
